Last year brought us Crystal Pepsi and Surge, but 2017 could bring a retro taste that is only for the bold.

New Coke (or Coke II), which was released in 1985 and almost immediately removed from distribution due to unforeseen consumer reactions, such as dizziness and nausea.

“The whole problem in the 80s was a mixup with the ingredients,” Coke spokesman Chuck Gagretch said.  “We ordered a shipment of coca leaves, but received cacao instead.  So it tasted different and people just didn’t like it.”

News of New Coke’s rerelease could not come at a better time.  Those unwilling to give up coffee during a shortage will enjoy a buzz unlike any other.  Cacao contains over 300 times the amount of caffeine of coca leaves.

New Coke will arrive on shelves January 30 and will last throughout the summer.


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