A man has been converted to Christianity after hearing the name of Jesus Christ. The man said he first heard the name after realizing the proper spelling of “Christmas”.
“I always wondered why it was pronounced that way,” Preston Parker said. “I mean, there’s no ‘R’ sound in ‘Xmas’.”
The 23 year old Starbucks barista first noticed a sign that said “Keep Christ In Christmas” a week ago, so he began to research exactly who this was.
Groups have long lobbied to change the name “Christmas” to “Xmas,” and phrases such as “Happy Holidays” or “Seasons Greetings” have replaced the more pious “Merry Christmas” in recent years.
“It’s not surprising Mr. Parker has never heard the name of Christ,” Bette R. Theneaux said. “Then of course there’s Santa, which is just an anagram of Satan himself.” Theneaux works at a law firm specializing in fighting the great war on Christmas.